My Plea for Your Prayers

We never know when life is going to disintegrate before our very eyes.

We never know when life is going to disintegrate before our very eyes.  Even though I'm more aware than most people and think I'm prepared for what may come, Thursday night when I was ready to prepare dinner, my ex-husband's wife called hysterically crying and saying that she thought he (Jim) had suffered a stroke.  Through her frantic sobbing, I was told that the paramedics were taking him via ambulance to Riverside Medical Center in Kankakee for treatment.

I had to tell my son, Bryan, that something had happened to his father and we needed to leave immediately.  After being assessed, it was determined that he did not have a stroke.....it was something much worse.  He had a brain mass.  Disoriented, and unable to speak, there was our strong patriarch lying on a gurney looking frail and helpless....hooked up to machines and tubes, etc. 

Today brought no good news.  He had pneumonia and they were unable to do a needle biopsy of his brain.  On top of that devastating news, we learned that when he fell during his seizure, he broke his back at T12.  They will have to cement the space between his vertebrae, but that is not the most pressing issue, and will not be addressed now.  

I ask for your prayers for Jim and  his wife Gail who, by the way,  is a cancer survivor.  His sons Anthony, Matthew and Bryan need your prayers of support and comfort.  In fact, we can all use them while we are struggling to make sense of it all. I can't think of anything else we need right now except the incredible power of prayer.  Prayers to take away our fear.  Prayers to give us strength.  Prayers to find comfort in our family.  Prayers to help us accept whatever God has in store.  Especially prayers for Jim that he will know his family surrounds him with our never-ending love for all he has done for each of us.   We each love him and want only the best for him. 

If you can do that for us, I will be forever grateful. 

This week I will sign off with a simple thank you. 




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Ryan Adorjan December 03, 2011 at 04:05 AM
Pat, While my articles on Patch have been put on hold, I've certainly been following things closely and, may I say, that all you are doing for the great community we all love is inspiring to say the least. Please know of my prayers and the prayers of all of us here at St. John Vianney Seminary for you and your family in this tough time. Please do not hesitate to contact me if I can be of assistance. Ryan Adorjan
Jill K. Amoni December 03, 2011 at 04:11 AM
I'll be praying for you, Pat...may the Lord's grace and mercy be with you and may the days ahead be brighter. May the peace that surpasses all understanding be yours during this troubling time...Blessings to you and yours...
Jane Enviere December 03, 2011 at 04:17 AM
Definitely keeping your family in my thoughts!
Dianne Morrissette December 03, 2011 at 04:19 AM
We will get the word out for prayer for this family. Life sometimes surprises us and it turns our lives upside down. There is nothing greater on this earth than the power of prayer. God doesn't do bad things to good people, but He will however use these things for the good of others....Dean and I have seen wonderful things happen to people through his recent accident and what he's going through. We will be praying.
patricia hish December 03, 2011 at 04:37 AM
Dear Pat, My heart and prayers go out to you and your family. May your family find the strength to get through this hurdle in life. I believe with all my heart that God listens to each prayer and will be by your side during this journey. I know first hand the strength you need right now. Just like Gail I'm also a survivor. It's been 10 yrs since my bilateral mastectomy and without all the prayers I don't believe I would have made it this far. Jim has God and modern medicine on his side, keep the faith. You have given so generously of your heart and time for so many others. If there is anything you need please don't hesitate to ask. My oldest son is finishing up culinary school so if you need dinner, please let me know. Anything you need my family is here. You have my e-mail so don't hesitate to ask, I'm right down the street. My thoughts and prayers are with your family, Patricia
Christina Quarnstrom December 03, 2011 at 04:44 AM
Pat -- my husband is a 10 yr primary brain tumor survivor, if there is any advice I can offer please let me know. Not sure if they've been able to assess whether this is metastic (meaning it spread from elsewhere) or primary (meaning it starts in the brain). I will keep you all in my prayers and send good healing thoughts.
Brad Polley December 03, 2011 at 05:04 AM
You have my prayers, Pat.
Cynthia Clark December 03, 2011 at 05:23 AM
Pat- I'm sending my thoughts and prayers to you and your family at this time. Keep the failth!
jerri powell December 03, 2011 at 07:37 AM
Pat, Everyone enjoys you and your family. Your strength from God will hold you and your family. My prayers to all of you. Peace,
Pat Gavros December 03, 2011 at 12:08 PM
Thank you all so much. I couldn't believe all of your beautiful comments when I opened up my email before six this morning. I am feeling fragile this morning and need that strength that has been sent, so thank you. I will keep you posted.
Jill K. Amoni December 03, 2011 at 12:22 PM
Ahhhhhhhhh....tears, Pat...we're all thinking of you and your family...and we're here to absorb some of what you're feeling so that you may get on, somewhat, with the business of life during this time of unrest...♥♥
Jill K. Amoni December 03, 2011 at 12:22 PM
You're beautiful....a beautiful servant of the Lord...♥
Suellen Tisdale December 03, 2011 at 12:45 PM
Pat, My thoughts and prayers go out to you and all the family. Life brings us all things to deal with that are at times overwhelming. But He never gives us more than we can handle. May the Lord bless you all and keep watch over you and the doctor's involved in his case.
Evelyn Santiago December 03, 2011 at 01:05 PM
Pat. My prayers and thoughts are with you and your family. I know first hand how something like this can take a toll on a family when its sudden and unexpected. May God's healing light and your family and friend's support ease your pain and comfort you.
Pat Gavros December 03, 2011 at 01:34 PM
I will have my son, Bryan, read all of your emails and posts. It will help him deal with this. He's 28 and so devoted to his Dad. Thank you.
Eileen December 03, 2011 at 03:29 PM
Dear Pat - What a difficult journey you are all on. Jim, you and your entire family will be in my prayers. I will pray for healing and for the mass to be benign! Sincerely, Eileen S.
Kathy December 03, 2011 at 03:46 PM
Pat -- you are all in my family's thoughts and prayers. You have done so much for this community over the past year and please know that we are all behind you in sending wishes for your ex-husband, and strength to all.
Rachelle Stoller December 03, 2011 at 09:29 PM
Sending healing energy to your ex-husband and prayers of strength for you and your entire family.
Pat Gavros December 03, 2011 at 09:38 PM
Thank you everyone for your powerful response. I am indebted to all of you. Jim looks better today, was more alert this morning and when told he was on antibiotics, he responded with "cool"....whatever that means. He knew who his sons were and although they couldn't understand anything he was trying to say, they knew he was cognizant. That's a good sign. We are just in the waiting mode right now. Keep up the prayers and good thoughts. Love to all.
Leslie Green December 04, 2011 at 05:19 AM
Hi Pat-much love and prayers to you and Jim and your boys - I hope you receive encouraging news in the days to come...
Pat Gavros December 04, 2011 at 12:35 PM
I'm so overwhelmed with all of your support during this time. You are so generous and caring. While returning home last night, his wife called to say they decided to intubate Jim. We will be returning mid-morning to see him. There is little we can ask for at this time except your continuing prayers. Thank you so very much. My son, Bryan, read your posts and he thanks you too. He is struggling right now.
Ken Boncela December 04, 2011 at 03:30 PM
On it, Pat.
Pat Gavros December 05, 2011 at 12:45 AM
Thanks so much Ken. Everyone has been so supportive and it's appreciated more than you can ever imagine.
Judy Siedlecki January 13, 2012 at 09:14 PM
Pat - I literally just read this! I'm so sorry. Your ex & Bryan's Dad is a lucky man to have so many loving people to care and pray for him. This is a dark time and I empathize with how difficult this is. God Bless You All as you traverse these rough waters. Judy & Phil
Pat Gavros January 14, 2012 at 01:34 AM
Christina, I would like to talk to you some questions we have concerning Jim's tumor. If you could call me when you have time I would certainly appreciate it, or email me and I'll email you back: branthonypublishing@yahoo.com OR 630-788-6964. Thank you for your thoughtfulness. Sorry, it took so long to respond, but didn't really know what to ask until now.
Pat Gavros January 14, 2012 at 01:41 AM
Thank you so much Judy! I went down to watch Jim while his wife went for a doctor's appointment. She's in her fourth year of remission, so this is very stressful and heartbreaking for her. Jim is just beginning his treatment starting tomorrow or Sunday. I can't remember. He's going to be taking a chemo pill instead of radiation. The team of doctors at Northwestern in Chicago are phenomenal (so says Jim's wife and my oldest step-son, Tony)! He's very weak right now and not wanting to do his therapy so we are struggling. He's walking with the aid of a walker, and talking quite well, except his memory isn't great. We are hoping he will get stronger and his memory will get a little better. When I was putting an ice pack on his shoulder, he said "Thanks". I told him, "Don't thank me, I'm not your wife anymore. I'll be billing you for these services." He broke out in a really big smile. I think he kind of remembered how zany I am! Keep praying for Jim and our family. We've got a long road ahead of us.
Judy Siedlecki January 14, 2012 at 04:05 AM
Hi Pat - These are extraordinary challenges for all of you. I (my family) went through it with my brother in our home. There are so many ups and downs, but with God's help (it's the only way I know) you will make it through. There's no recipe or easy way. You'll have to draw strength from and give strength to one another as needed. It sounds like you are already a well oiled team who know how to be there for each other. It's a beautiful thing really. Just remember, in making Jim your number one priority, there are times you will each have to grant yourself the right to being #1 occasionally. I have every confidence you will all figure out a way to make this the best possible experience for all concerned. You will never be alone because God will be there for each and every one of you every day all the time and He will give you all peace and assurance that the choices you make are the ones that are right. Keep the faith that all is as it is meant to be. In God's Love, Judy & Phil


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